I realized that if I could let go of my ego; if I could melt myself into the Fa of the cosmos, who could the evil persecute? If “I” did not exist anymore, how could the evil persecute me? That was a wonderful feeling of true freedom and fearless integrity.

总经理接到辞职报告，打电话来跟我交流。她 没说太多，只委婉的指出，在认识我的这些年中，她觉得我虽然还算精进，但似乎总脱离不了一个“自我”，做什么事都带着非常强烈的自我色彩。如果我能突破这 一关，将在修炼路上前进一大步。
她的话说的很婉转，但在我听来，却象平地里 响起一个惊雷一般，让我有惊心动魄之感。我突然意识到，原来，不知不觉之间，我已经又将自己包裹在厚厚的“自我”之中了啊！
记得迫害发生后不久，当我第一次意识到应该 走出来维护大法、而不是躲在家里所谓的“精进实修”时，我曾所体验过什么叫“放下自我，溶入法中”，那一刻真的体验到了“天清体透乾坤正，兆劫已过宙宇 明”（《劫后》）的无以言说的美妙，同时也体悟到：“我”已经没了，已经与宇宙苍穹合为一体了，那 邪恶还去迫害谁呢？“我”都不存在了，它还怎么迫害？那一种体验，真的是大自在、大无畏啊！

However, after coming to Australia and participating in different Dafa projects without my realizing it, I had been choosing things that I liked to do or was good at. Gradually, I became more or less a loner. Sometimes when I saw other practitioners’ attachments of wanting to become project coordinators, I felt quite proud of myself because I thought I did not have such an attachment. I seldom volunteered to do the background or behind-the-scenes work. Many times, practitioners would set the stage for a project, and then I’d make a grand entrance and grab the limelight. Everyone looked to me. I was always the one talked about in the reports and I was always in the photos… so it was all about “me”, “me” and “me”. 

然而，来到海外，开始参加各种讲真相活动 后，不知不觉之间，都是在捡自己喜欢做、擅长做的事在做，慢慢的就变成了“天马行空，独来独往”。看到有的同修有想当协调人的执著时，心中还为自己没有这 种执著而自傲。我也很少去做幕后的、默默 无闻的工作。很多时候，都是别人把“舞台”搭好，请我去“表演”；当我站在台上时，众人的目光都集中在我身上；活动的报道出来时，照片上登的是我……总之 都是“我”、“我”、“我”。

Why am I unwilling to take on the role of a coordinator? It’s because I thought I had special abilities in some regards, so I should use those abilities well. But I thought being a coordinator did not require special abilities and there was too much communication required. To put it simply, it was again my attachments of selfishness and self-centredness reappearing. They were such strong attachments! Why couldn’t I let go of my attachment to my “special abilities” and harmonise with others, and create more opportunities for others in the NTDTV project? Why did I chicken out again and not seek to break through in cultivation? After I had those realisations, I had a dream that night. I dreamt that I climbed up a very steep hill. Upon waking up, I understood it was the encouragement from Teacher.

我为什么不 愿做协调人呢？不就是认为自己如 何如何有某方面的能力，应该最大限度的发挥自己的能力，而把协调人事等等这些“婆婆妈妈”，又不需要多少特别能力的事甩给别人去做吗？说到底，这不就是 私、就是放不下自我吗？说严重点儿， 不就是又退回到走不出来之前的那个“自我”当中去了吗？这在修炼上，还不够让人觉的惊心动魄吗？我为什么不能把所自认为的所谓能力放下，去成 就别人、成全别人、为更多的同修创造参与新唐人工作的机会吗？我为什么要在困难和矛盾面前退缩，而不能再次突破自我呢？
悟到这些后，我当晚就做了个梦，梦见自己爬 上了一个很高、很陡的陡坡。醒来后，我知道这一定是师尊在鼓励我。

二、学会向内找，学会放弃
Learning to look inward and letting go

I gave up the idea of resigning and was determined to make a breakthrough in this test. I also wanted to avoid conflict with another coordinator. However, because I did not elevate in my Xinxing enough, conflicts were bound to surface. As I looked outward, I thought more and more about how I was correct, and I was becoming more and more emotional; I felt more and more that I must have been wronged. Eventually, I lost my temper one day and dumped all my resentments and unhappiness on a fellow practitioner who had come to discuss a project with me. He quickly ran away from me. I then grabbed another practitioner, and complained about all the unfairness I had suffered. 

我放弃了辞职的想法，决心一定要突破修炼上 的这一关；同时尽量回避与另一位协调人之间的意见分歧。然而因为心性上还有一关没有过去，所以矛盾一定会继续显现。当我向外找的时候，越想越觉的自己有 理，越想越心血沸腾，越想越觉的是自己受了委屈，有一天终于控制不住，劈头盖脸把心中的委屈和不满都发作在一名找我商量工作的同修身上，吓的他没听两句就 赶快溜走。我又抓住另一位毫不相干的同修，喋喋不休的诉说，恨不得立刻找个人来替我“主持公道”。

The next morning, I realised I was so out of control the day before. How did this happen? Which of my attachments was causing this? As I looked inward, I immediately found it. It was my resentments towards the practitioner who had different opinions from me. This was obviously wrong and I must let go of it.
第二天一早，我回想起头天的事，知道自己是 失态了。那么我为什么会失态？到底是什么执著心在起作用呢？我略微向内一找，立刻就找到了：原来，我心中已经生出对那位与我意见不同的同修的埋怨心、不满 心。这显然是不对的，我应该放下它。

When I had the righteous attitude, I immediately felt very calm. And when I thought of the practitioner again, I did not feel any resentment or negativity. Master have asked us to “look inward”, so why did I only look at her and her attachments\? Perhaps I was right, but it was because I pointed out her mistakes that her attachments were touched, and as a consequence, she refused to cooperate with me. Shouldn’t I be thinking about why I was being unkind, not considering others’ feelings and situation, and not cultivating my speech? How many people have I hurt through my speech in the past few years?
此念一出，我立刻感到非常平静。这时再想起 同修，心中终于没有了愤愤不平和其它任何负面的感觉。师尊一再要求我们“向内找”。我为什么找来找去，总在找她有什么执著呢？就算是象我想象的那样，是因 为我指出她的错误，才触动 了她的各种执著，以至于她不愿与我合作，那我为什么不想一想，是不是因为自己太不善、说话、做事太不考虑别人的感受和接受能力才造成的呢？这么多年来，我 出口伤人的时候还少吗？

Looking further inward, I realised that I may not be absolutely right. Perhaps there were some good points in the other practitioners’ suggestions. Master has said adopting which-ever idea is not as important as practitioners trusting each other and cooperating well. In the past few years, Australian practitioners have been insisting on their own ideas and therefore wasting valuable time and causing damages to different Fa-rectification projects. It’s about time we all learn our lessons. So why should I insist on my own ideas, rather than step back and accept others’ ideas? Why can’t I trust other practitioners’ explanations instead of interpreting her positive efforts in explaining things as her not wanting to give up her attachments? Why can’t I step back in the face of conflicts? 
再往下找，我又意识到：自己难道真的就那么 对吗？同修所提的工作方案，难道就没有任何可取之处吗？师尊不是早就讲过，采取什么方法并不关键、大法弟子之间能够互相信任、互相配合才最关键吗？这么多 年来，澳洲弟子因为各执已见、争执不下而耽误宝贵时间，并给大法项目带来损失的教训还不够多吗？我为什么一定要坚持自己的想法，而不能退后一步，接受别人 的方案和想法呢？我为什么不相信同修的反复解释，而非要把她的正面解释看作是她为自己执著不放而找的借口呢？在矛盾面前，我为什么非要往前顶，而不能向后 退呢？

In “Teaching the Fa at the 2002 Fa Conference in Philadelphia, USA” Master said: “When another God proposes an idea, they aren't eager to reject it, and they aren't eager to express their own ideas and they don't believe that their own ideas are good. Instead, they look at what the end result of the other God's proposed approach will be. The paths are different--everyone's path is different--and the truths that beings validate and enlighten to in the Fa are different, too, but the results might very well be the same. That's why they look at the results, and if the result of a God's idea can achieve the goal, if it can truly achieve it, then all of them will go along with it. That's how Gods think. Also, if there's something lacking in it they'll unconditionally and quietly supplement it to make things more complete and perfect. That's how they handle things.”
I realised again: It does not matter how right I think I am at any time, I cannot stubbornly hold on to my own ideas. This is because it’s likely you may find you’re not absolutely right the next day. So, why hold on to your own ideas?

师尊在《二 零零二年美国费城法会讲法》中早 就说过：“当一个 神提出来一个办法的时候，他们不是急于去否定，不是急于去表达自己的、认为自己的办法好，他们是去看另外的神所提出的办法的最后的结果是什么样。路是不同 的，每个人的路都是不同的，生命在法中证悟到的理都是不同的，可是结果呢很可能是相同的。所以他们看其结果，他的结果达到的，真的能够达到要达到的，大家 就同意，神都是这样想的，而且呢，哪块有不足，还要无条件的默默的给予补充，使它更圆满。他们都是这样处理问题的。”
我再次意识到：不管自己在某一时刻认为再对 的意见或想法，都不能固守，因为你很可能在第二天就发现，原来认为十分对的，它并不一定真的对。为什么要固守呢？

After I gave up my own ideas completely, I did not get so attached to my notions of how the news department should be run. I accepted other practitioners’ suggestions and tried my best to harmonise the whole body with the best of my abilities. Master has said in “Teaching the Fa at the 2002 Fa Conference in Philadelphia, USA”: “True improvements come from letting go”, and in Zhuan Falun: “One’s gong level is as high as one’s xinxing level, and this is an absolute truth.” I quickly discovered, after I had learned to look inward and let go, not only was the work of the news department not affected; to our delight, it improved.
于是我彻底放弃了原来的想法，也不再执著于 自己对新闻部应该如何如何的设想，而是接受同修的方案，同时在自己力所能及的范围内，尽量做好协调。
师尊早就讲过，“真正的提高是放弃”（《二零零二年美国费城法会讲法》），“心性多高，功多高”（《转法轮》）。我很快便发现，当我学会 向内找、学会放弃之后，新闻部的工作不但没有受到任何影响，反而在不知不觉之间又迈出可喜的一步。那就是，我们想了很久，却一直没有实现的加强当地落地台 的报道之事，这一次终于有了起色。我们在完成提交总台的新闻的同时，也开始为当地常人的落地台提供社区报道类小节目了，而且这类节目也可同时提供给总台的 《澳洲广角》节目播放，那么就是一举三得了.

Also, the practitioner who had refused to work with me earlier on started to contact me. We talked about how to better improve our work. After I have finished writing this sharing, I sent a copy to her and asked for her opinion. Not only didn’t she hold any negative opinions about me, on the contrary, she opened herself up to me, and told me that she didn’t want to work with me because I was too aggressive in my speech. And she was afraid of such an approach. After our positive sharing, the conflicts between us dissolved. 
另外，那位以前拒绝与我合作的同修，也开始 主动联络我，商量怎样把工作做的更好。当我写完这篇发言稿，将草稿发给这位同修征求她的意见时，她非但没有象我担心的那样有任何负面的想法，反而向我敞开 心扉，表示以前不敢跟我合作，是因为我太咄咄逼人了，而她从小就怕被“逼迫”。经过这样的正面沟通，我们彼此之间曾经有过的看似不能调合的矛盾，也就烟消 云散了。

Through this process, I can see that the issue is not how others have treated me, but the problems lie with myself. “The environment changes according to your mindset”. When I have too much negativity in my thinking or the way I do things, people will be pushed away. Whereas, if I am not attached to my own ideas and am able to listen to others’ opinions calmly, I can then understand others and their feelings. Consequently the situation will improve.

Of course, to do the job better also relies on the quiet contribution of many practitioners and the elevation of the group as a whole. It’s not just about one person. Sometimes, a news piece of just over one minute takes more than ten hours to complete. I understand if I as the coordinator did not improve my xinxing and understanding, the news department’s tasks will be affected. 
通过这个过程，我也看到，其实真的不是别人 对我怎么样的问题，而是我自己怎么样的问题。“相由心生”，当我的思想或处事方法中有太多的负面物质时，才会让别人退避三舍；反之，当我能做到不执著、不 固 守自己的想法，能够静心倾听，站在别人的角度体谅别人的处境和感受时，环境就会向好的方向转变。
当然，工作能够往前迈一步，包含着许许多多 同修长期默默无闻的付出，以及大家共同在修炼上提高，绝不是我一个人怎样的问题。有时候一条一分多钟的新闻，前前后后得花二十多个小时才能完成；但同时我 也体会到，如果我作为协调人的心性和认识不能提高上去，那一定会直接影响新闻部的工作。

三、随时随地讲真相圆转如意
Clarifying the Truth at all times and at Will

Working for NTD TV is also clarifying the facts. Being a journalist, however, also brings about many opportunities for clarifying the facts. When we are sincere about it, there will also be opportunities for us.

For example, during the 2007 APEC meetings held in Sydney, the then- Australian Foreign Minister held a first press conference. On my way there, I thought to myself that I must grab the opportunity and ask a question about the forced organ harvesting of Falun Gong practitioners in China.

It was a big venue and there were several hundred journalists participating from all over the world. I quickly settled down in the first row, so that I would have better chance of asking the question.

After the Minister finished his speech and announced that questions could be asked. Almost all the journalists there raised their hands all at once. The staffer who stood in the centre of the venue and not too far away from me did not know what to do and who to give the microphone to. As she hesitated, I said to her in my heart: “Please pass the microphone to me.” Subsequesntly, she walked to the front, walked past several journalists next to me and handed the microphone to me. So I stood up and asked: “Last year, former Canadian MP and co-author of “Investigation into Allegation of Forced Organ Harvesting of Falun Gong Practitioners in China”David Kigour visited Australia. The Australian Government promised to conduct an investigation into the issue. This year, Mr Kilgour is again in Australia to call on the world leaders attending the APEC to pay attention to the issue. Can I ask what the Australian Government has done in the past year?”

参与新唐人本身，当然就已经在做讲真相的事 了。然而，作为记者，在工作过程中，还存在着大量的其它讲真相机会，只要有心去做，随时随地都有机会。
比如，2007年亚太经合会在悉尼召开时，二十一 国政府首脑和几千名各国代表和记者齐集悉尼。几天后，澳洲外交部长举行第一次新闻发布会，在去参加发布会的路上，我一直在想，一定要争取到提问机会，提出 中共活摘法轮功学员器官的问题。
到现场一看，会议厅很大，出席发布会的各国 记者起码有好几百名。我赶紧坐在第一排，心想靠前面的座位得到提问机会的可能性会大一些。
结果，外长讲完话，刚说“现在可以开始提问了”，场内几百名记者几乎同时齐刷刷的举起了 手，让拿着话筒、站在离我很远的会议厅中间位置的工作人员不知所措，不知该把话筒给谁才好。
在她犹豫不决的时候，我很自然的在心里对她 说：“你把话筒给 我。”结果她真的 越过所有其他举手的记者，走到最前面，再越过几个比我坐的更靠近她的记者，直接把话筒递到我的手中。于是我站起来问：“去年，前加拿大议员、《中共摘取法 轮功学 员器官调查报告》的作者之一大卫•乔高到澳洲问时，澳洲政府曾表示应该对中共活摘法轮功学员的指控进行国际性调查；今年大卫•乔高先生又来到悉尼，呼吁亚 太经合会首脑 关注此问题。请问在一年之中，澳洲政府对此做了什麽？”

The then-Australian Foreign Minister was sued by Falun Gong practitioners for issuing certificates preventing them from demonstrating outside the Chinese Embassy in Canberra. It’s not hard to imagine that he must have been quite shocked by the question. As a result, for the press conference next day, journalists were asked to submit their questions beforehand in writing. This caused a lot of complaints among the journalists. Nevertheless, those journalists, several hundreds in number, had all heard my question in the first day; they would have all heard of the Kilgour-Matas report. So perhaps some of them might have looked up the report or reported on the issue.

当时的澳洲外交部长，正是那名因迫于中共压 力而限制法轮功学员在堪培拉中共大使馆前打横幅而被学员告上法庭的官员，可以想象，我的问题让他感到非常震惊，以至第二天澳洲总理再举行新闻发布会时，他 们连规矩都改了，要求记者提前把问题写在纸上，在发布会之前就交上去，弄的各国记者怨声载道。但不管怎么说，那天在场的几百名记者，都听到了我的问题，听 到了“中共摘取法 轮功学员器官调查报告”，也许其中就会有人去找这份报告看、或者报道这个问题。

On another occasion, The Australian Foreign Journalists Association invited the leader of the opposition to give a speech. I also applied to attend the event. The secretary of the Association was quite serious about her work and he sent to everyone a detailed list of the participating journalists’ names, organisations, countries and the seating arrangements. Because she knew I represented a Chinese language TV station, she put “China” behind my name.

I wrote back to her immediately and asked her to change the country behind my name to “USA” or “Australia”; I explained to her the independent nature of NTD TV, and how the Chinese Communist regime was afraid of NTD TV exposing its true nature, and the regime’s efforts in suppressing the TV station.

In the following day at the lunch function, perhaps as a gesture of apologising for her mistake, she let me asked the first question. Before asking the question, I again emphasized that NTD TV’s headquarter was in New York, it’s an independent TV station and not belonging to the Chinese regime. This made all the participating journalists (about 100 of them) and the leader of the opposition smile in a friendly way, as if they all understood the meaning behind my words.

There are rules to follow as a journalist and we cannot step over the line. However, our work allows us to reach everyday people at different social levels. If we have the heart to do so, there will always be opportunities for us to clarify the truth. There are different ways to clarify the truth, and our wisdom bestowed by Dafa will allow us to do so appropriately and at will.

还有一次， 澳洲外国记者协会邀请澳洲反对党 领袖来演讲，我也报名参加。记者协会的秘书长很敬业，把每个报名参加的记者的名字和其所在媒体的名称、国家、每个人应该坐在哪里等等，都一一列出来发给大 家。因为她知道我来自一家中文电视台，就想当然的在我的名字后面写个“中国”。
我立即给她回信，要求她把我所属媒体的国家 改为“美国”或“澳洲”，并很自然的讲了新唐人独立报道的立场， 以及中共惧怕新唐人、打压新唐人的真相。她立即改正错误，并将更正后的名单再次发出。
在第二天的午餐会上，也许是对自己前一天所 犯错误有所愧疚，这位秘书长将第一个提问的机会给了我。我提问之前，再次强调自己是总部位于纽约、而不是中国的、独立的新唐人电视台的记者，听到这里，在 场的一百多名记者和澳洲反对党领袖，都友好的笑了，似乎听懂了我的真正含义。
记者有记者的规范，不能超越记者的规范做 事；但同时，由于工作之便，记者又能接触到许许多多平时接触不到的社会层面。只要有心，到处都有我们可以讲真相的对象；而讲真相的方式，在大法修炼所赋予 的智慧当中，可以运用的圆转如意。

四、万古机缘无上荣耀
Precious Opportunity, Unprecedented Honour

A few years ago, when I noticed Master mentioning NTDTV, The Epoch Times and the Sound of Hope in his teaching, I was shaken and felt really honoured. I thought to myself: those media established by Dafa disciples were mentioned in the Fa. This might have meant that they will exist forever with the Fa and will be remembered in the history of the universe. To be able to participate in the media valued by Master is such an honour and blessing.

I’d like to thank our venerable Master for rectifying the universe and sentient beings at the last havoc. Thank you, Master, for helping the Fa-Rectification Period Dafa Disciples establish their future and mighty virtues. In order to do this, Master gave his all. We can only do better and better, so as not to disappoint Master, for this opportunity only comes once since the creation of the Cosmos.

Thank you, Master. Thank you, fellow practitioners. 

几年前，当我第一次看到师尊在公开发表的讲 法中提到新唐人电视台、《大纪元时报》和《希望之声》时，心中就感到无比的震撼和荣耀。我想：大法弟子所办的媒体，能够被写入大法经文，是否就意味着他们 一定将与大法同在，并从此永远被铭刻在宇宙的历史上呢？能够参与备受师尊重视的媒体工作，又是何等的荣耀和荣幸！
感谢师尊救大穹与众生于危难之际；感谢师尊 呕心沥血，为正法时期的大法弟子能够参与助师正法、建立属于自己的未来的伟大威德而操尽了心。我们唯有做的更好，才能不辜负这开天辟地都未曾有过、以后也 永远不会再有的万古机缘。
谢谢师尊、谢谢同修！